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Wake Up and Check Yourself All the Time, Part 3 of 3

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Wake up. Have some more love, some more kindness. Wake up, check yourself whether you really have any love in your heart, any kindness, or just talk, talk, talk. Talk is easy. Check yourself, in any situation, you will wake up and see whether or not you are truly a practitioner, truly have kindness in your heart or not.

Just a few days now, I came here. I came here and I was very, very tired. Actually, I don’t know how to explain this to you, not just because I have been tired all the time, it’s just that sometimes you meet some people and they make you tired. Do you have this experience or not? Yes or no? (Yes.) Yes? Suddenly, I’m just tired and I thought, “OK, one time, two times.” But always! Whenever I see that person, I just like almost swoon out, want to go to bed immediately.

And then so, of course, other people who come here, so-called help me, still want to expect me to work all day, all night. This is a very funny story, but I’m not meaning to criticize that person or anything. I just want to tell you it’s very difficult to be a Master. Nobody understands you. Even though they say they understand, “Yeah, yeah.” They love you, they understand you, but it’s not true, it’s not true. They expect you to do things the way they think that you should, Master or not.

So the third day, I said, “I’m still very tired. I can’t keep doing this and that.” They said, “But You sleep three nights already,” that person told me. “Slept three nights already.” Of course, I do sleep! How about you? You sleep 300 nights, every night, and nobody complains. I cannot? Because I first came here and there’s no dogs, no disturbing helpers, so I said to them, “Wow, the first night here, I slept very well. I’m so happy.” But then it became different, it became like exhaustion even though I slept already. Every time I see that person, another person, I immediately feel so drained. Drained! So, so tired! Just want to jump into bed immediately. No washing, no eating, no drinking, no thinking, nothing. So drained!

But the other person told me I slept three nights, it meant I’ve been here three nights already, no dogs, because I said the first night, “I have no dogs here, no people disturbing, no disciples.” I slept the first night for so long, after so long time, since a long time, this is the first night I’m here, I slept so well. And then because of that, he said, “You slept three nights already.” Well, thank you so much, very generous! I could sleep three nights, thank you. And all the time I should just do my work and stay awake all the time. Is that way right? Is that correct? Yeah, I’m telling you.

I sleep three nights but not always sleep. I mean a little bit quiet, no dog barking at midnight or two, three o’clock in the morning, but that doesn’t mean I really sleep well. How can I sleep well when the world is not well? And with you praying all day, all night for every little pimple on your face, that I should remove it. What I mean is just like I compliment this place, it’s nice to be alone for a change, like that. But three nights is nothing for my exhaustion, especially if somebody caused me to be more exhausted. I can’t explain all this to you. I’m just telling you, but I don’t tell you who it is. Don’t try to guess. You couldn’t. Never mind.

But how can you love a Master and expect Her to be always working for you the way you want or for the world? I work willingly. There’s no need to push me or nag me even. I’ve worked all these decades already. There’s no need to kind of expect more from me. What I can, I give, understand that? And if I’m not really tired, I wouldn’t say it. Even if I’m tired, I work all night also. Many times, I just have to go out and wash my face quick, cold water, or go out in the fresh air and then come back, work again.

If you say you understand the Master, that is really not understanding at all. Not sympathetic, not loving, not kind, understand? Not kind. “I’m almost 70,” I told this person. And my body has been like abused for decades, so it’s not just today. So I said, “Even if I sleep 300 years, I would not recover.” It’s just that I have to put up with it and go to work, that’s all. But I cannot believe that there are some people who are not loving and kind, so bad like that. I mean, not bad but so not understanding very well.

That’s what I’m telling you when I really feel very down and low, that nobody really is there to understand or support me just a little bit in sympathy only. I ask nothing from you. I normally also don’t tell you anything. It just happened when we are talking. And then I just told that person, just explained why I couldn’t. For the moment, I couldn’t do this and that, I just need more rest.

“She sleeps three nights, oh my God!” Understand that? “You sleep three nights already.” So that means that’s all I’m allowed to rest. My God, what kind of a Master who cannot even allow yourself to sleep more than three nights? You took everything away from me…. …in this case. Like you want to take everything from me. My own decision, my health, my private time, the way I live my life, when I want to sleep, when I need a rest or not. This is a terrible feeling, understand that? Like I never give enough. As if I don’t give enough, as if I reserve something for myself. Just sleep well three nights, already criticized. Do you understand that?

I’m not telling you this so that person feels bad or anything. I want him to have a better mental understanding of things. So if I say something like this to you, I want you also to wake up, OK? Wake up. Have some more love, some more kindness. Wake up, check yourself whether you really have any love in your heart, any kindness, or just talk, talk, talk. Talk is easy. Check yourself, in any situation, you will wake up and see whether or not you are truly a practitioner, truly have kindness in your heart or not. You understand what I’m saying?

I’m almost 70, understand that? People, they retire at 60, and I’ve continued working ever since I was young until now. And of course before that, I worked for the world. I earned my living, just like everyone else. After that, I still continue earning money so that I can share my wealth, if I have, to someone else who needs, even I don’t have a lot. But in Âu Lạc (Vietnam) we say. “One morsel of food while hungry equals a big box of food while full.” It means, you give somebody in need just one morsel of food, it’s better than you give him a big package when he is not hungry. Just so that he can continue to live until he gets some better means to survive.

When the Buddha was practicing asceticism, He was so weak after so long a period of not eating. So the first time He came out, He could not even have control of His body. And then one of the Indian women gave Him some milk to drink, and He regained His strength. That’s why He believed that asceticism to the extreme is not good. That’s why He told His monk, “Don’t practice like hunger, and fasting, and all too long. You have one meal a day, that’s a big fast already.” For example. I don’t advise you to do that.

It’s just what I mean is, the body does need something, does need rest, does need food, does need a drink. Don’t punish your body for anything. Don’t punish it. You need it. You need it strong and healthy, so that you can practice well. But don’t eat because of greed, that’s all. Eat enough to practice. Sometimes eating too much, also very sluggish, meditate with your head on the floor.

OK then. I’m going to do my job, outside job. The inside job needs more time, but I feel like I am not doing my inside job very well. I only rely on the night, and I meditate during sleep, or contact Heaven during my body rest. That’s the only time I could have more peace to do it. Daytime I’m working. I even hate it when I have to eat, take some time to eat, and then take some time to digest, and take some time to eliminate it. I sometimes hate it.

I wish I don’t have to eat. But everyone is different. If you need to eat, you eat, all right? I give too much food, so I have to eat my good merit. That’s what it is. I give people too much, life after life. All right then, I’ll see you. And I’m here. I’m here, nearby, very near. So it’s like you meditate with me all day, all night. If any problem at all, really urgent or something, and the contact person cannot take care, then maybe she comes and tells me, OK? Otherwise, you just meditate, everything will be better. Do all of you understand? (Yes, we understand.) I also forgot…

Is there anyone who traveled three or four days to come here, but didn’t get to see me yet? (Yes.) Is there anyone who took three or four days to travel here, meaning coming from somewhere far away like Heilongjiang? Anybody? (Yes.) Yes, oh! I forgot to tell you to sit here. Sit here later, all right? (Yes.) Later if anyone comes from afar, can sit right here. Understand? (Yes.) OK? Can you hear that? OK.

I say like, Chinese people, they came from far away, from the other end of China. It takes them sometimes two days, three days, four days to reach Taiwan (Formosa). And then, they see me only Sunday or something. So I said next time, that kind of people can come and sit here, so they can see me a little bit more. You are not jealous, no? OK.

How many of you? Raise hand. Anyone who hasn’t seen me in Hsihu, please come. Come over here, those of you. Who? Understand? Do you understand anything? Those from somewhere far away in China, come here. Come quick! I have to go back to work. Those who took two to four days to travel here, come over here, understand? You understand? Understand? Come here. Come. Those who came from far, far away in China. Come, come, come over here. Bring me those (vegan) cookies and candies for those who came from afar. Don’t be greedy if you came from somewhere near. Come, come. I don’t have a lot of time to take care of you all. Sorry! For those who came from afar. You also came from afar? Come. Taking two days is also far. Usually, I’ll take care of all Mainland Chinese. But I’m just one person and my body is limited. So, please be understanding. OK? Do you understand? (Yes.) I really love you dearly. I’m very touched (Thank You, Master.) that you come from afar. (Thank You, Master.) I don’t know if…

The Aulacese (Vietnamese), any of you who are from far away that it took you two days to come here? How many days it took for you to get here? Two days? Anyone who two days, or one day, two days travel, come here. Come here! Why do you sit there? Come here! If you want, you come here. (Two days.) From two days until four days travel, you come here. Understand that? OK. I’ll just throw. Because it takes too long to give it one by one. I don’t have time. OK? If you are taking too many, each of you just take two and pass the rest to your neighbors. We learn how to share. OK? (Thank You, Master.) We share all properties. Right? “Communism!” Sharing all properties! Each of you gets two. This is not a big marketplace here. We don’t have enough. OK? So each of you gets two. If you have too many, give to your neighbors. Do you understand? (Yes.) OK, come! I love you so much! I’m so touched that you came from afar. (Thank You.) Come, come. OK. Ok! Each person takes two pieces. Because we don’t have a lot, understand? OK. OK, sorry guys. Share, share together. Those who don’t have it, raise a hand. There is an extra. You only have one.

Those from somewhere far away in Mongolia can come and get some too. If you already have it, don’t take anymore. Each person gets two pieces. OK? I told you already. This is not a 7-Eleven store. Each person gets two pieces. (Thank You, Master.) Those who don’t have, raise a hand. Or else we cannot finish. Come. (Thank You, Master.) Here, papa. You all have it, yes? Give. (I will share.) Korea, Korea. This, for Korea, yes. One more. One more here. For the elderly, special. (Thank You, Master.) You’re welcome. (Thank You, Master.) OK. I’ll see you. Love you. Love you, love you. (Thank You.) Here you go. OK. Love you, love you. (Thank You.) Love you, love you very much. Love you so much. Love you, love you. (Hallo, Master.)

My shoes are over there. I will go there later. (OK.) It’s also fine. One for each of them. One for each person, OK? Don’t forget to give it to the guys.

How’s everyone? (Good.) From Kaohsiung? (Kaohsiung.) (Taoyuan.) Huh? (Taoyuan.) Taoyuan? Oh, it’s too far, but you still came. (Yes, we are translators.) Translators. OK. Thank you, everybody. Thank you. Thank you. Wow, we have all kinds of languages, wonderful. Do you all speak English? (Yes.) Very good! Please take turns to take care of English speakers. OK? (OK.) Each person takes one shift a day with a sign: “Speak English.”

(We will have to leave soon.) Going home? When are you going home? How come so soon? (We will leave in a short while.) You are going home soon? Luckily you can see me once. (Because I go to work tomorrow.) You go to work tomorrow. (We come here whenever we have time.) Going back to Âu Lạc (Vietnam)? (I live in Taoyuan.) You stay in Taoyuan? Ah, Aulacese living in Taoyuan. Wonderful. OK.

Listen, Kaohsiung people. Find out those who can speak both Chinese and English to take turns, if possible, but not for the entire day. I mean, at least have them in the evening or afternoon, for example. Make a schedule to rotate. OK? And write large letters here with a big red band: “Speak English.”

I tell them to take turns to stay here on duty for English speaking. And they will wear a very red band here, on their arm, saying “Speaking English.” That means they also speak Chinese. So, in case that you need something, you find these persons. They probably sit in the office, there is office somewhere. Tell them to sit where people can find, in the office. Office. Understand? So English speakers can see them with a big red band and write in English. For both English and Chinese, or for both English and Aulacese (Vietnamese), etc. At least some people can speak English.

The Aulacese (Vietnamese) who know English, if you are still here, then take turns to wear that red band every day, to translate so that people who don’t speak Aulacese (Vietnamese) and Chinese can understand. OK? Because those translators will go home soon. Whoever still stays here, then translate.

OK. Goodbye. (Goodbye. Thank You, Master.) Goodbye. You’re welcome. Bye! I love you. I love you. I love you comrades. I love you, comrades. I love you. Bye-bye. Love you guys. (Master, I love You.) (I love You.) Take care of each other.

Those who know Chinese and English, then take turns every day. You register to let them know so that you will take turns to translate, to help those who speak English. English or Aulacese (Vietnamese). Translate from Aulacese (Vietnamese) to Chinese. Or translate from Chinese to Aulacese (Vietnamese). Whatever language you know, then register to let them know, OK?

I said those of you who know both English and Chinese, or know both Aulacese (Vietnamese) and English, or both Aulacese (Vietnamese) and Chinese, etc., please sign up with the administration staff. If you are here, please queue up. If you are gone, of course you can’t help. If you are here, just queue up to help your fellow citizens.

Good. See you. Love you. (Love You. Thank You, Master. Bye, Master.) Love you. Thank you.

Goodbye comrades. Whoever goes home, have a good trip. Those handsome guys, who know Chinese and live in Taoyuan, come here at night, if you are available, to translate for your fellow citizens. Wear the red band so that people know. Whoever knows Chinese and Aulacese (Vietnamese) then volunteer to translate, OK? Let them know, so that they give you a red band to show that you are a translator. Understand? OK. It’s a special job for you, earning merits.

I love you guys. (Love Master.) Love you. (Love Master.) OK. Bye.

Who are you? (I’m a teacher.) Korean, right? You look like a Westerner a little bit. Don’t cry too much. Your eyes will get hurt. I see you around. I’m right here, very near. Just a few steps. I must go to work. I must work alone, otherwise I cannot concentrate very well. Always throwing (vegan) cakes, how can I work? I have no hands to write anything. I must be alone to work.

Hey, old mama. Nobody gives her (vegan) cookies! (I had it last time.) Did you have it last time? Give you again, OK? Be careful. (Master still remembers you.) (Thank You.) I remember you. (Thank You, Master.) So pretty. She is old, but she’s still so pretty. (Master is pretty.) Take care of her, everyone. Give to the elderly first, OK? Let each of the elderly choose some. Sorry. (Thank You, Master.) OK, I’m leaving. Bye-bye.

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